Finally ready to get back on my FES exercise cycle…

 Monday was a great day. Karen came in and fed Dude, fed me, and then put the sling under me, and we waited for the physical therapist. I have waited so long for this day, and I'm really excited; she will try to set me up to write my exercise cycle again… I hope we can figure something out. We did it, and I went 5 miles; I can't wait till the end of the day to see if any damage was done. After LeAnne left, Jack from Numotion and Debra, the OT, came by to help me order a new commode chair. I hadn't seen Jack for at least a year, maybe two, and he has changed a lot; he's lost a lot of weight, and he moved to Monterey… He uses live just the next street over, and I saw him all the time. I want to special order a commode chair because I'm tall and need one that tilts in space. My cousin's daughter, I think that makes for my second cousin? Had her twin boys; they were both tiny and had to stay in the NICU for a month or two… They are a couple of beautiful, strong boys! Dude and I took off for a nice long cruise through Depot Park; when we got down to Cowell Beach, it was so beautiful I lost track of time taking pictures, the only way that I know I'm spending too much time is when I keep looking down and dudes chin is on my leg looking up at me… He is so sweet and patient. We cruised down to the end of the boardwalk and back, taking a bunch of pictures; we cruised down to the end of the wharf and back. I noticed another mural, and I also took some more pictures; one of these days, when it's nice, I'm just going to cruise around Santa Cruz because, during the pandemic, many people wore painting murals… I wish I was that creative and could find somebody to paint murals on my fence. It was that time again, so we cruised back home some days, I just love this place, and some days I wish I could just move away, but when everything looks gorgeous like this, I can imagine moving away. We cruised back home and barely made it in the door before Rachel came in. She fed the hungry hound dog, put me to bed then fed me. She cleaned up the kitchen, washed a couple of loads of laundry, dust mopped the floor then went home. I played candy crush for a while, edited some pictures while listening to music, then watched a movie and fell asleep.

Tuesday was a good day, really busy. Cindy came in and fed the chill little pill, fed me, then got me dressed and up in my chair. My first errand was stopping by the parking permit garage and getting new parking passes for my house; I hope they give me three again this year. They've given me three in the last couple of years because I always have so many people here: caregivers, maintenance, housekeeper, chef… The line was way too long, so we decided to return another time. We cruised over to Safeway to do some grocery shopping and pick up prescriptions; my mom is in cookie-making mode, so every day, she's trying a new recipe. More baby pictures; I miss seeing these babies grow up. Did I just think that?? All my life, my brothers promised that they would not push their babies on me, and they never did; I just adored all of the kids, and I did like hanging out with them, but when they're in the baby stage, they have a lot of snot, urine, and drools. I'm sure they still do, but if I've learned, one thing after all these years in a chair is that I am washable. It's so fun to watch them grow up; I don't want to miss this. After we went shopping, we cruised over to the wellness center on E. Cliff Dr. to meet up with Roger and Karen, we were planning on starting another support group, and it sounds like this one's going to be a lot more thought out, and hopefully, it's going to work. They talked about using the old Facebook website life on wheels and partnering with the Northern California support group out of Valley medical center; they have been running strong for many years. We haven't been back home, and Bill and James were still here trying to fix my ceiling lift; it broke yesterday morning, and usually, it doesn't take them very long to fix it, but according to them, my house has settled a lot. They don't know if they're going to be able to fix the part of the left that goes into the bathroom so I can take a bath; I don't know what I'm going to do if I can't take it back… I got so used to it, and I love it so much. They got here at 11 AM, and here it is 3:30 PM, and they are still here; I didn't know how to tell them that I needed them to leave at 4 PM because Dr. Owens was coming by at 5 PM and I needed to be in bed so she can do a breast exam. I filled out a form on depression before the last time I saw her, and I answered everything honestly, but she seemed a little concerned, I told her I think everybody's going through this during this time and I in no way want to end my life. Rachel cleaned up and went home, and I spent the rest of the evening listening to music, meditating, and trying to remember everything that happened during the day… It was kind of a manic day, but everything always works out and works out in time. My mom came down and gave me a couple of cookies before letting Dude out to go potty one more time, and then she went back upstairs. I watched a movie and then fell asleep.

 Wednesday was a pretty good day. Karen came in and fed the hungry hound, fed me, and then we did some personal care and a nice hot shower. James from West Coast mobility came back to semi-fix the ceiling lift, so we don't have to put me in the Hoyer lift to push me into the bathroom to take a shower; that was a huge relief. The Hoyer lift just doesn't lift me up high enough to get me back on the bed; I know it should because that's supposed to be what it's all about, but I don't know if it's because I'm too tall, but it sure is a lot easier when we can use the ceiling lift. It seems like the longer I live here, the more things begin to break down, and I thought there was going to be a problem when the house starts settling; I live right behind Neary Lagoon, so I think it's inevitable. I'm fortunate that I can at least take a shower, but it just doesn't warm me up and make me feel better like a nice long hot bath; it took me a while to get warmed up. I noticed the phone was ringing a lot, but that's been pretty average the last couple of weeks because of all the appointments I need to make for my year-end/year beginning annual exam appointments. Pretty soon, Karen said, "Susan is calling a lot" then I remembered I was supposed to meet Susan and Ory down at the Light House with the Dude so they could have a puppy play date, and we could have lunch and catch up. I called her back really quick and told her I was so sorry and told her what's been going on, I told her I wasn't going to be getting up, but she agreed to grab lunch and come by here so we could still catch up and the dogs can play in the yard. Susan always seems to find the best places to, she brought some Chinese food from the Golden Palace, and it was so good. We hung out for a while, and then she went home. It was great to see her, I'm used to seeing her every Wednesday and now I don't see her at all. We go to concerts, hiking, picnics, and parties… She is so much fun to hang out with. She has the sweetest dog, her and Dude get along so well… I can't wait to take them over to the lighthouse and watch them play on the sand. After Susan left, I looked up portable blowup bathtubs, thinking that I would have to put one in the middle of my bathroom for a while to get a bath… Luckily, it would be delivered the night before the next time I take a bath, so we'll see how it works. My cousin sent me some more pictures of the twins; they look stronger every day… They do a lot of skin-to-skin, and I really think that helps a lot. I watched TV until Rachel came in; she fed the hungry hound, fed me, cleaned up and wiped everything down, and went home. Earlier, I found a universal remote that will work from my computer and electronics, such as DirecTV, Apple TV, Bose, and the LG TV… I'm so excited! I have been looking for something like this for a long time; usually, if I want to watch Apple TV, I have Karen leave it on when she leaves, but then if the phone rings or somebody comes into the room, I forget and try to turn it off with the remote I already have on my computer. It turns off Apple TV, and I can't turn it back on… Now I can watch whatever I want whenever I want. I'm trying to get rid of a lot of the TiVoed shows that I have seen over and over and get more TV series and movies to watch. Life just keeps getting better and better! I was talking to my cousin Rich, and he was telling me about this movie on Netflix that he was watching, so I started watching it, and it was pretty scary; it was about this girl who got catfished on tender for about $200,000. I always think to myself, "how could somebody be so stupid" but then I was thinking about how many really super smart people it's happened to… Including me. I used to watch shows on it when I watched Dr. Phil. I listened to some music and meditated until I fell asleep.

 Thursday was a pretty good day. Karen came in and fed the hungry pooch and fed me, and we ended up doing a little more personal care. When Susan brought over the Chinese food yesterday, she said something about the soup is really good for evacuating your bowels; she was right. I ended up having to cancel my physical therapist; I still have a pressure sore on my butt, so I wasn't going to be able to get up on my exercise cycle anyway. I wonder if I'm ever going to be able to get any exercise without getting a pressure sore? When Karen finally got me dressed and up in my chair, Dude and I took off for a cruise. James from West Coast mobility came back to hook up my ceiling left to get into the bathroom to get a shower after the program; on my way out, I reminded Alexa to remind me to lookup an inflatable bathtub later on tonight. We cruised through Depot Park; I'm pretty sure I saw a Rafael… He was on the soccer field; I wonder if this means he's coming back to work at the ballpark. I do miss seeing his handsome face. The birds were going crazy, so I took many pictures and videos when I got down to Cowell Beach; it looks like some sort of feeding frenzy. I guess it seems really cool to see thousands and thousands of fish swarming around from above, but unfortunately, I can't look over the peer and see it for myself; I overheard somebody say, "look down here, there are thousands and thousands of fish." We cruised down to the end of the boardwalk and back, and there were even more birds there; I love it when they'll take off at the same time and fly around… I don't know why. I know I would definitely be flying around and checking everything out if I had wings. Can you imagine how cool that would be? We cruised back home, and I reclined and watched some shows that I TiVoed until Rachel came in. She fed Dude, put me to bed, then fed me. I played way too many candy crush games, and after Rachel went home, I looked up some series on Apple TV to watch later; I'm so excited that I found this universal remote that can control everything with my computer… I just can't make myself stop and go to sleep! My cousin Rich texted me a video of his dogs asking for a treat, they are so adorable, Smart and they know exactly what he says. Adriana texted me about 10:30 PM with some pictures of a car that flipped over just to the left of our street; I'm so glad it didn't happen just to the right because that's where Adriana lives… Before they put up a little white picket fence, there were always people going down the hill too fast and landing in her front yard or vehicles that ended up in the front yard or through the property. I listened to some music and edited some pictures, eventually falling asleep.

 Friday was a pretty good day. Karen came in and fed the hungry guy, fed me, and then started on some personal care… I am not looking forward to not taking a bath after personal care; a shower is just not the same. By the time we finished with personal care, I am sweaty, freezing and I just wanted to soak in a hot whirlpool bath, and it just erased all the miserableness away, whereas when I take a bath, I do feel better but is not the same. Karen got me dressed and then up in my chair. As I took off for a nice long cruise with my little buddy, I noticed as we were coming out of the driveway, there was something wrong with one of the gates, so I cruised over to take a look, and the gate was totally ripped right off of the post, I don't know if somebody hit it or if it was the wind… A couple of days ago, we had a really, really bad wind up to almost 100 miles an hour. I'll never know what happened to the gate, but luckily Omar is coming by tomorrow so he can fix it for me. I also ordered an inflatable bathtub, and Omar is going to change out the shower in the bathroom for a wand, and we'll see how that goes; I'm hoping it's only a temporary thing until they can fix my lift, but I don't know what I will do if they can't fix the lift. Just another thing that makes me think it's time to move to Oregon and be around my family, I know it's just a matter of time, but between my health and my house, it seems like I don't know how much longer I could just be independent and by myself. I cruised through Depot Park and down to  Cowell beach. Even before I crossed the street, I could see all of the pelicans cruising around and diving into the water; I just love that. I could watch it for hours, but unfortunately, my little traveling companion sticks his chin on my leg and stares up at me like he saying, "come on, mom, let's go." I try to cruise about 5 miles every day, and that way Dude gets in some good exercise, and I get to see everything I want. I cruised down to the end of the wharf, and as I was coming back, I ran into Vince, so I stopped to chat with him for a while, Vince is one of the few people I really feel comfortable around, and I love his stories, and basically, he has a great life! Most people I run into, I'm really not even hearing what they're saying because I'm thinking to myself, "when would be a good time to leave" I'm getting better at talking to people is getting a lot easier… At 60 am still a work in progress. We cruised down to the end of the boardwalk and back and took many more pictures and videos; after trying, I still can't figure out how to post my videos on the blog… I'm sure it's straightforward, but I just can't figure it out right now. We cruised back home just as Rachel was pulling in, perfect timing. She fed the hungry hound dog, put me to bed, got me something to eat, and cruised around and cleaned up and wiped everything down before she went home. I started watching this new series called dopesick; it stars Michael Keaton and Kaitlyn Dever… I ended up watching the entire series in one evening because it was so good. I've always been a Michael Keaton fan, and I've been watching the series last man standing. I love Kaitlyn Dever's character in that series. After I finished, I looked it up, and I guess it was a miniseries which, according to Alexa, is not going to be more than eight or nine episodes. But now that I have my universal remote, I can watch anything I want, and I love it! I made it to the end of the series and then fell asleep.

 Saturday was a really great day. Cindy came in and fed Dude, fed me, got me dressing up in my chair. I sing a new foot doctor today; I loved Dr. Harray, but he does surgery now on Tuesdays, and that's the only day I have a driver, I've seen one other Dr. over there a couple of times, but I'm trying to get all of my appointments over to Sutter because that's where my primary care is… Sometimes she doesn't get the reports if it's not a Sutter Dr. We came back, and she took off to go help Adriana set up their brother Josh's birthday party; I can't believe he's 18! Wow! He is a remarkable young man! I don't know how Rosa doesn't, but she just keeps putting out these incredible individuals! Dude and I took off for a nice long cruise through Depot Park, over to Cowell's Beach, down to the end of the boardwalk and back, down to the end of the wharf and back. There are many birds again out on the ocean, and the seals are jumping up out of the water in herds; it is so awesome to watch, but unfortunately, my camera must've slipped down, so I didn't get a very good picture or video of it. It is such a beautiful day; I cannot wait until summer. I've been thinking about buying a house in Oregon; I think it would be good for my mom to be there around family and the babies… I would love to be there; also, I'm so torn. I LOVE this place, and I love Santa Cruz, but it's getting so hard to find caregivers, and it's just not the same. I may change my mind when it becomes summer, and I can get up and out early and stay out late every day; I will at least get the house over there so my mom can live there and maybe air B&B this place for a year and see if I want to come back. This is going to be a tough decision. I wish I could have both of my brothers and their families around one of these David works for Delta, and they can fly over whenever they want. I really want to watch the babies grow up and be a part of their lives and the rest of my family, I drink and hide from everybody for so many years, and I regret it so much. We cruised back, and Rachel was already here setting up my bed; she fed the hound dog, put me to bed, got me something to eat, did a couple of loads of laundry, cleaned up and wiped everything down, then went home. I spent the rest of the day editing pictures and catching up on my blog; I'm almost caught up. I watched a couple episodes of last man standing before I fell asleep.

 

Sunday was a nice relaxing day. Cindy came in and fed the hound, fed me, then straightened up the garage, washed a load of clothes, took inventory in the garage and the kitchen before she left. Karen came in, and we started right in to do some personal care; really anxious to see how this blowup bathtub works. We did some personal care, and the inflatable bathtub took a really long time to fill up; I had to have my legs out from my knees down to fit, but it's a lot better than just taking a shower. For some reason, if I just take a shower, my bones are still chilled, and it takes most of the day to warm up. She put me back to bed, fed Dude, fed me, cleaned up, and then went home. I spent the rest of the evening watching ninety-day fiancé and listening to some music before I fell asleep.